Clerks in unholy orders…

CHRIS BENNETT has been reflecting on the glittering displays of rubbish in our streets these days.

I SAW a lumbering 4x4 in town the other day. It gleamed black and shiny, fat with dark windows and thumping great chrome roll bars, seemingly designed more to intimidate the onlooker than protect the occupants.

It sported, for want of a better word, the number plate NPS 1. This made me think that it was the runabout of the mayor of this pretty and popular coastline.

Now don't get me wrong(ly). I am against neither conspicuously bad taste nor conspicuous number plates; but "Times", to quote the other Dylan, "they are a-changin'". Fast.

Would you not think that during an increasingly vicious cycle of economic woes, and a spiralling food price index, not to mention an ever louder people’s cry against corruption, a less obvious form of self aggrandisement on the part of the clerks and their cronies would be a good thing?

The following gem by Peter van der Merwe was in the M&G last week:

“Then let’s talk about our esteemed minister of communications, Siphiwe Nyanda. The man clearly likes his bling. How much does Mr Nyanda like his bling? Oh, you have no idea. No sooner was the ink dry on his new employment contract than his mind turned to the biggest challenge he could find in his portfolio: how to pillage the electorate most effectively.

“His response was mundane only in its lack of imagination: he purchased not one, but TWO BMW 750i sedans for the trifling sum of R2.2 million. One for his office in Cape Town and one for his office in Pretoria.”

I later read that a minister in the cabinet (and we have more ministers than most of the population have had hot dinners) explained that no rules were broken in the purchase of these excesses. Really? That is what most members of parliament in London said. Then, surely, it is time to change the rules.

The cry by various bigwigs that the disturbances in Gauteng are the work of the “criminal element”, whatever that may be, was at best pathetic and at worst embarrassing. The delivery of services for the past decade has been little short of appalling. People, especially people who vote are not stupid; misguided, sometimes, but not stupid. There is no problem with service delivery; it is the management of that delivery that is the probem.

As regular readers of this column know, I am a frequent visitor to Nzimakwe, where I have quite a few more readers. My brother, who recently visited the area (he is a human rights specialist) was moved to observe of Thongasi and Nzimakwe, “There seems quite a lot still to be done”. I refrained from comment.

Our president, Mr Zuma (I presume he is still the president; he seems to have been seen and never heard of again), has commendably come down hard, verbally, on corruption.

Surely the clerks of menial and slightly more than menial status should operate with a car pool of Citi Golfs, Polos and Yarises, preferably white (the racially sensitive should note that the reason for this choice of colour is that it reflects the heat of the sun and avoids the need for expensive air-conditioning).

Wigs of the slightly larger variety might have a couple of Corollas or Elantras at their disposal; but no Mercs, no Beemers, no Audis, no Volvos or other types of material excess (echoes of the French revolution?) which might lead to the inflammation of the passions of the starving voters.

Just a thought in passing, you understand.